Father's Day

Father's Day was an interesting amalgam of Fatherhood Appreciation. I wanted to give Matthew everything his heart desired, and I wanted to give him a special day full of favorites to honor him (he's pretty much the best dad I know). I also wanted to spend some time with my own dad, and with my grandpa, both of whom I don't see very often. So we went up to Hemet to visit with my dad's side of the family, then the rest of the day was for honoring my baby daddy.

Can we be honest, here? I mean, it's only a few of us now, so why not, right? I feel kind of crappy about that day. I was a daughter on Father's Day, which was important. It was great to see my dad, grandpa, uncles, brother, etc. But spending four hours in a car with Ben in one day was, in all honesty, terrible. He's not a good traveler, and he doesn't nap well anywhere but his crib. So he was pretty grouchy for most of the day, and unfortunately the majority of his grouchiness (and, subsequently, mine) fell on Matt's half of the day. So we drove up to Hemet, partied with the Cobbs, then drove home. Ben probably slept for a grand total of 45 minutes, and most of that was in the drive up. Which means that by the time he went to bed he'd been awake for about 9 hours. That's a lot for an almost-two-year-old. He did okay at the get-together, but not so much after that. We hit a lot of traffic on the way home, which made Matt angry and miserable, which was taken out on me (which I suppose was fair--it was my idea to go--but I did not order the traffic). By the time we got home we were three angry and crabby travelers. To be honest (because that's how we're playing today), I didn't really feel like playing June Cleaver right then. I was angry with Matt for being mean to me, I was frustrated with Ben for being very unpleasant, I was dealing with a fiery fight in my heart about other things, and I was tired. I didn't want to make dinner, I didn't want to clean the house, I didn't want to entertain Ben while Matt indulged in video games, and I didn't want to be all sunshine and rainbows. When we got home I took Ben to the mall so that a) Matt could have some Matt time, b) so that I could take a break from him, and c) so that Ben could make a father's day craft at Pottery Barn. But the mall was insanely crowded, and Ben was just a real peach. So the mall trip was short, which means I was even more keyed up than when I had left, and Matt had less Matt time. I gave Matt his craft from Ben, we ate dinner, Matt played video games, and I really don't remember the rest of the evening.


Truth be told, it was not my favorite day. I spent time with my dad--that was good. But Matt got whatever tired and grouchy pieces were left of me, and that wasn't really fair.

One bright spot was that Ben and his Uncle Jared were wearing virtually the same outfit, which was cute. I have also determined that we will never do Father's Day this way again. Not sure how we'll work it out, but this was a one-time deal.


So to my Matthew, who did not hear it on Father's Day because his wife was to busy throwing a temper tantrum...

you are an incredible dad. of the kind I didn't know even existed. I love watching you father Ben. I love the way you play with him, cuddle with him, and sweetly love him. in short, you're amazing, and Ben is the luckiest little guy in the world to have the best daddy ever.