Important Thoughts, Part 2

Here are some things I've been wanting to tell Kaiser today:

--After his nap today, Ben just got out of bed, opened the door, and came out. I think he reads my blog. He's so smart.

--I know I'm a part of the Estrogen Club, but there's something I don't understand. What is the deal with spending five full minutes in the bathroom stall? I mean, I know that the full bathroom trip must include, for many women that are not me, the whole hair and make-up deal. But what are they doing in the stall for that long? I mean, you go in, do your biz, and get out. Am I missing a step? Have I been doing it wrong all these years? I seriously don't understand.

--Moms, for the love of your children, wear appropriate clothing. When you go into public with your small children, please do not try your impersonation of a pre-teen with daddy issues. You are an adult. It's time to accept that.

--Is there a conspiracy against pregnant women going swimming? I feel like when I had to buy a swim suit when I was pregnant with Ben there weren't a lot of choices, but there were at least a few stores that I could try. This time around I have seriously found ONE store with maternity swim suits, and when I say maternity swim suits I mean two choices of the swim suit version of mom jeans. I bought one because I need one, but I'm not happy about it. So when you see me at the beach this summer lugging around my house and my son and I look like a whale who is trying to fit in with the OC crowd, please don't judge.


--We drove past the Gooing Colon sign today. Sadly, it looks like the Colon place is out of business. But you will be happy to know that a Massage Parlor has taken its place. So if you're interested in a Gooing Massage, I can point you in the right direction. Although in my opinion, Gooing Colon was more amusing.

--This morning we went to two three-year-old birthday parties. One was a pirate theme, one Strawberry Shortcake. So Ben got to dig for buried treasure then jump in a bounce house. Also, his food intake was: a donut, juice, a cupcake, a lollypop, and a few strawberries and bananas and grapes. Oh, and a marshmallow. Tonight he is at his first sleepover at Nana's (!!!), so I'm sure he'll be eating copious amounts of crap during their movie night. I'm just going to go ahead and pretend like food-wise, today never happened. Sound good?