Adrenaline

I ran cross country and track in high school. One year during one of them, I think track, I was out running with one of my teammates. It had snowed a few days before. You know how after a few days snow gets a crusty layer on top with lighter, softer snow underneath, like a Nestle Crunch ice cream bar? Well, we were running on the ice cream bar snow, which was pretty hard, so we were staying on the crusty surface. At one point I stepped down a little hard on one patch and my foot went through. I felt no pain, of course. I didn't even look down--I just kept running. A couple of miles later, at the end of our run, we returned to the gym. Several people looked at me upon my entrance, their eyes immediately darting to my leg. A few said "gross," and many made strange faces. Curious about their reactions, I looked down at my leg. Half of my leg was covered in blood. Apparently, when my foot went through the snow's crusty top layer, the icey covering had cut a two-inch gash in my leg. And then the pain began. It started as a few sharp twinges. Soon the tears were falling and I was crying out for relief. See, I had been running on a crisp winter day. Adrenaline and the cold had prevented me from feeling the extent of my injuries.

Last Monday as I got into my car in the morning, my foot crashed through the ice. For the last week and a half I've been running. This morning the adrenaline began to wane, and the sharp twinges set in. By the time I was a block from work the tears were falling, and I was crying out for relief. I hurt all over. I love my job, I do. But I found my heart aching all day as I taught. I miss my little guy desperately. I miss playing and smiling with him. I miss cuddling and kissing him. And I hate that when I get home I'm so exhausted that half of me wishes he naps for a bit so I can rest, and the other half of me wants him to be up and ready to be my play buddy.

This gets easier, right?